dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
