508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
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