Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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