Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
In other news, I just burned my penis
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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