Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Randomize