your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
