i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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