If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
