Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
