i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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