wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
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