it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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