hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
