She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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