i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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