I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
In America we eat man semen.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake đź‘Ś
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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