my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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