I wish i was in the wii world.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
