Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I just want to make out with him forever
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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