Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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