This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize