She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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