Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize
