Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
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