it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
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