You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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