I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Randomize