i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
it glows. i had to have it.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
