Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
the liver wants what the liver wants
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
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