seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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