3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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