I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
