I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Randomize
