so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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