im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
