i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Fuck appropriateness.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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