Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
