Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
