whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
