i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
