capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize