Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize