One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
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