oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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