she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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