Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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