okay pat passed out under dana's car
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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