HIV tests are more positive than that guy
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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