Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
