i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
