so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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