long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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